2D printers: your new tech-based friend

Technews Writer
Sat Mar 31, 2018

We've gotten used to having 3D printers in our homes; it's second nature to print a new foot in the scenario where we just happen to lose our foot. It makes sense, and we've been doing it since the '80s, but what if I told you there was a new technology that only requires the deaths of millions of trees and a box of ink or a laser? Look no further than the new 2D printer technology, currently being pioneered by companies who have previously made a name for themselves in the 3D printer market, such as HP and Xerox. The latter of the two companies is known for being the first 3D printer brand, getting so far as becoming a household brand. Without further ado, 2D printers, your new technology-based best friend. Note that this article will be based on an ink-based HP 2D printer, specifically the HP DeskJet 1112.

Upon purchase of your 2D printer and after a simple setup process (which includes plugging it in), you might find it reasonable to say hello to it and give it a greeting pat. This is not necessary, but your 2D printer is more likely to be your friend if you do this, as with any new technology. The HP 1112, amazingly, can print text and images onto any 8.5-inch by 11-inch sheet of paper, in both color and black and white. 3D printers unfortunately are unable to print in black and white, so you will find this a very welcome upgrade if you prefer life to be colorless when represented on paper, like I do. This particular model can hold 60 sheets of paper at a given time; the sheer novelty of the 2D printer may well bring you to use all 60 sheets in a single day. For perspective, if you do this every day for a bit over eight days, you can easily get through a 500 page stack of 2D printer paper. According to the internet, one whole tree can create up to 20,000 sheets of 2D printer paper, meaning you could get through about 40 stacks in the span of a year, and revel in the fact that you were able to fully utilize 1-2 whole trees in your everyday life, all by yourself.

It was touched on briefly before, but the HP 1112 allows you to print in both color and black and white. Once you run out of your initial supply, simply go to the store, purchase a new ink cartridge, put it in your 2D printer, throw the old cartridge out, and contribute to a significant environmental hazard that exists due to chemicals in 2D printer ink on the scale of 350 million cartridges per year in the US. Not only will you be able to print indefinitely provided you have money and a drive to print, but you can also rest easy knowing you contributed to something significant, all without having to do much work at all. Compared to 3D printers, there's no conceptual work involved in printing at all. Design work? No. Purchasing specific plastic materials? No way. Putting your mind or a random Google image on a sheet of paper? Definitely. The benefits are clear: buy a 2D printer today.

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2018 - Spring - Issue 11 (April Fools)